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The Speeding Turds

American Government Special Collections Reference Desk

Stock Car Racing Topics:  NASCAR

The Speeding Turds

Jeremy T. Sellers
Jerm's Joint
February 26, 2008


I know I've been lagging in my publications as of late. However, I didn't want to rush into a prejudgmental article about my feelings on Daytona. However, after watching a grueling weekend of racing brought to us by mother nature, perhaps my opinion can seem a little more objective? Who knows? I reckon that's for my readers to decide.

Sitting in the hot Florida sun on February 17th, I had built up about all of the anticipation I could for the 50th running of The Great American Race. After all, THIS was auto racing history! We had been to all of the vendors we could muster, obtained all of the pre-race freebies, obtained some descent photographs, and even managed to grab Casey Mears', and J.J. Yeley's autographs. So, with all of my newfound gems stored in the back seat of my pick up, we sat patiently, roasting in our seats, waiting for the start of the race. (...and yes, in February, near 80 degree temperatures is considered hot for us Yankees!) It's unfortunate that my anxiousness was quickly quenched with disappointment as the race got under way.

Don't get me wrong, the last 25 laps of the Daytona 500 had me on the edge of my seat! It was some of the most exciting racing I had seen in a restrictor plate race in quite some time. However, the first 175 laps were like watching groups of wheeled-turds meandoring in small groups over a 2.5 mile tri-oval. We saw no competitive edge that we normally take in at the big tracks. There wasn't much passing. Yes the cars were faster, but when you can't draft by someone, it tends to tighten everyone's sphincter, keeping them in line. My buddy Michael even began to doze! Even Dale Jr. was heard on his radio regarding the race being boring. Hello? Mr. France? Mr. Helton? Are you there?

I've sat back and observed many other opinions and most seem to relate the same issue. No passing, no excitement. I may be jumping the gun here folks, but after two races, I'm concerned, VERY concerned! California is a track that shouldn't even be on the circuit in my opinion. It's always been a less than stimulating event...and to think, they robbed the Labor Day Weekend from Darlington to race yet a SECOND fecalfied event at Fontana every season. So what do we do with 43 speeding turds?

Fear not my fellow fans! I have faith in the short tracks. I believe Bristol, Martinsville, and Richmond should mix some paint and sheet metal. Darlington's got a good shot, too. However, on the superspeedways and intermediate tracks, it appears there's still some work to be done on the Cars of Today. It goes beyond "tweaking".. .hell, tweaking is what meth addicts do when they go without a fix, but that's paramedicine. There needs to be some sort of overhaul, but what kind? I'm not an engineer, only a fan. A fan who doesn't want to yawn at any more races, or fall asleep while watching them at home. The sport deserves better. WE deserve better.

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